If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
Yeah but if I do that, I'd have to buy my own stomach pump for the house. That doesn't seem like a great thing to have sitting on the coffee table.
i would only ever fuck harry potter if he was on a broomstick.
All I remember is yelling RUN as fireworks started going off in the kitchen. Who said that was a bad idea?
That was the most comfortable bag of doritos I have ever slept on!
I shit you not, me and my date were in that bar and within a 10 minute window, 4 ex gf's entered. Every one clocked me and gave me evils. I swear they're conspiring.
Our room will be decorated with my urine.
somehow this turned into a costume party you have to get here now with my banana suit or I'm wearing my birthday suit
Xanax and an ambien. And wine. I'm just waiting for mouth to mouth from some hot EMT. Sort of like the slutty girls version of sleeping beauty
Someone sharpied "COCK HUNGRY" on my butt cheeks last night. When the fuck did I have my ass out?
As a home can we vote to stab Peter?
What is it in my brain that makes me look at a penis and think "that belongs in my mouth"?
My professor just said irregardless, get me out of here
I guess he's ir-illiterate
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