They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
Listen. I'm a changed woman. I have no problem using him for sex.
I was preparing to do my walk of shame shirtless, but then I found my sweater, wallet and keys neatly piled under a tree in the park.
Everytime the frat boy touches his bro's ass after making a cup take a drink
I'm eating the rest of the Xmas shrooms and welcoming 2012 by communing with the pine cone.
He's socially awkward. He has a big dick. We've had this talk before, they're socially awkward because they don't leave the house they just sit home and play with it.
He lasted about 30 seconds then said you can't win them all. But then he made me pancakes so it's okay. We shall call him mancakes.
Hows the party lookin?
At a live sex show right now. Not sure about the employee party
Being able to fart in my own house is like 90% of why I pay rent
Please hurry. I'm the only one here who's not an attorney with a trophy wife.
Let's put it this way. Mom is bringing me a new shirt and I smell like lube.
Why didn't we pregame for this?
Because it's breakfast!?!
He bought me pizza and bourbon and played scrabble with me. So naturally I slept with him.
I should have robbed the cradle years ago. Turns out 21 year old boys can cum and still fuck me silly a minute later. My vagina feels like it just won a car from Oprah!
I wish he’d realize all I want is dick. He’s my boytoy. He’s a stunt cock. \n\nCome over, fuck me silly, eat some leftovers, fuck me again, then go back to the frat house
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