I am not having having sex with guys at the moment.
I can pretend to be a girl if you want. I have a tongue.
does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
There's a girl in front of me with a see through white shirt on and her back says I suck bad dick. Fun night hun?
Look you found him on craigslist. You should be happy that he at least HAS a normal looking dick.
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
will i regret this in the morrning? probably. but every decision is good during happy hour
Off topic, but is it sad that Matthew and I are calculating how much sex we need to have in order to work off a taco bell burrito?
you know it's gonna be a good 4/20 when you start saving up for it in january.
I'm about to fuck a girl in an old school Tony Kukoc Bulls jersey. About to earn my third championship ring in sex
I'm so happy I'm only on my second drink. That would have been the best idea ever if I was on my fifth.
I asked this couple what they would like to drink and they leaned toward me eagerly and asked if we still have THE root beer ... Idk if this is code for please add cocaine to my drink
Tequila ran out around 11 so she let them do body shots of chips and guacamole instead
I'm never going to adult. I'm staying a child. The only thing related to adult that I want to do is you.
Just had the biggest masturbatory crisis ever.
What does that mean?
Internet is down.
He ate me out in the passenger seat of his Range Rover in a Tim Hortons parking lot. I could hear “oh canada” on the radio from a nearby school as I came. Most patriotic orgasm ever!
Randomize
