i fucked some guy last night. i called him nick jonas by mistake. i'm 24.
she told me I give head better than a lesbian. I know it's a great compliment but it kind of threw me off.
he somehow instantly knew i was from vermont.
it probably had something to do with chasing your soco with maply syrup.
help me choose which girl to send myself boning to my girlfriend to make her want to break up
which one looks the most like her?
Be still, my beating vagina.
God you people are gross. Come collect your unconscious friend.
I wonder when walk of shame thursdays in the rain will finally make me stop drinking.
Tell me again your tentative move date. There are 5 Russians in my apartment on ecstasy and they are having a rave in my living room. I can't. I need to move stat
Yeah but sometimes your vagina needs to be fed and when we are drunk we tend to eat junk food
don't judge my taste in strippers
I would go a lot of places to get laid. But I would NOT go to Staten Island.
It's like the dark age of my sex life being stuck here
I can't remember what I did last night, but judging from the state of my hair I had a pretty good time.
the yoga instructor with the "dirt" and "roots" tattoos is seriously mother nature. i get my period after ever session i have with her. i'm trippin' balls over it.
I just realized u compared me to a coconut
Randomize
