i just picked a peanut m&m up off the floor. with my toes. and then proceeded to eat it.
it was like weight watchers had a halloween party.
the cops didnt even wait to start drinking the confiscated alchohol from the party
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
You guys tried to boil water to fill up the empty hot tub. After the fourth trip back with the kettle you gave up.
i threw up on the table at the pizza place and peed in her room mates closet. i wouldnt invite me back either
We found a swing set....it's in the front yard.
The only funny part about this situation was this morning when they rounded up all the drunks in the ER, piled us into a minivan, then dropped us all off at our houses.
Bathtub guy came to. He helped me roll the fat chick away from the fridge. Shower and breakfast are on. You're plan failed!
its kind of scaring me that i am turned on by tom cruise in rock of ages
i was enjoying my post acid trip trance a little too much. i found $50 on the sidewalk but didnt pick it up. just stared at the bill cuz it looked cool.
someone picked it up and i stared at the ground where it was for probably another minute or 2
Turns out floaties are a great thing after a couple bottles of vodka
Jesus fuck that was emotional whiplash
I might go bald with this hair pulling thing every night.
He burst in the bathroom while I was peeing to hand me my beer I was looking for earlier tht night. And my pants were already down so I thought why not
Randomize