Im handcuffed to some kid i hardly know. there are no cops involved
I can die happy now, I have been kicked out of strip clubs on six different continents
Sorry for making you give strangers a ride for hits of acid.
Going stoned out of mind to my sociology exam because it's really just a pizza party. I love community college.
Gosh I haven't been pantsless in front of anyone for a while. It's time for me to pick up my game. We need a party. I need some rum.
Bad news? she threw her drink in his face, left her phone at the club, and disappeared. I found her laying in bed with the bottle she stole from our VIP service. Good news is she's asleep and I have the bottle, come home
My younger brother just got high fives from all my guy cousins for fucking my best friend. I hate family gatherings.
You are one of my favorite baseball you have fun today
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
Walking towards a police car with full spotlights on you while being fully erect..awkward exp. for both parties
well it was great until i saw his anime body pillow
Please don't think I'm weird for texting you this at 12:08 am but I just found another picture on the Internet where I think you can see his dick through whatever he's wearing
I'm surprised this is your first encounter with pepper spray. surprised, and somewhat proud.
When we found you, you were half crying/half singing Taylor swift songs at 2am in the bathroom, and occasionally puking. I think I get "friend of the year" award just for putting up with your drunk ass all night.
Ya that dick wasn't worth burning a perfectly good pizza.
You live and learn.
Randomize
