she was left over bi-product, like the hotdog of the human race
how can i incorporate a boy scout uniform into what i do tonight?
there are chunks of pepperoni under the sheets. can you be here in 10? breakfast in bed?
I've decided I'm either going to ease him into this breakup by having a threesome with him and the girl I'm leaving him for, or be brutal and fuck his room mate. it depends how nice he is tonight.
You peed in the parking lot while a car was was waiting behind us. And when people walked by you proceeded to say "careful you might slip"
You're getting a blowjob this afternoon. This has been your morning public service announcement.
He stopped in the middle of us having sex and asked "is today Monday?" then went even faster
I'm just walking around Lowe's groping the carpets....
What do you want to swallow. Press 1 whiskey press 2 rum
Sweet! It'll be a "that-minor-I-used-to-serve-alcohol-to-is-no-longer-a-minor" party!!!
My roommate is fucking his gf in the shower and i really have to pee do i just bust in or pee on his bed
Just fantasized about my boss's fingers in a meeting. I desperately need to get some.
So Saturday night after 10 drinks I guess he tried to have sex with me and in the middle of it I asked "can you tell I'm faking it!?" and then I sat up and threw up in my hand. That's a sex Win in my books
I literally just want someone to fuck me and buy me cheeseburgers. I don't even want a relationship at this point. Just a chew toy and some food.
You had sex with a kid to spare him the shame of being a virgin. Evidence is on my side.
Randomize
