Words i added to my t9 today: gnomes, facebook, and chlamydia.
I got oddly confused when she started talking in third person in bed.
we'll penetrate his innocence with our dicks
He refused my I'm sry gift of ANAL. That's how angry he was.
We are possibly on our way, unless we see the limo full of strippers.
He offered to drive me out of state to meet up with my fuck buddy. Like best brother in law ever.
judging by her collection of mens sweaters, shes fucked the entire lands end catalog.
WHAT IF you could get pizza delivered to you IN YOUR CAR while driving somewhere. Like moving roadside service.
You're High aren't you?
Sooooo high
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
He tried to do the do on me last night and my exact words were "stay away from my princess parts. they're renovating."
Should we go get some celebratory "I'm not pregnant" tacos?
I just saw a girl drinking wine and walking her dog in footie pajamas and a mad hatter hat. First day of the new year and I think I'm in love.
I feel like you should put up a missed connections ad for this..
I just got a robo call from the Addiction Help Line. Not sure how to take that.
The condoms have been found. I repeat: THE CONDOMS HAVE BEEN FOUND. he isn't a collector!!!
I'm glad that we laid to rest the suspicion that he was keeping them in a scrapbook. yayy
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