I mean roof. it goes up. its important day. you should recongziw it.
You're drunk. Make complete sentences.
It's not luke its my birthday or anything. Mike, understand.
i have to start hiding my credit card when i drink i woke up this morning with 4 emails from Farmville telling me i spent over $800 on coins last night
I wouldnt endorse that guy if he was walking in a walkathon to raise money for a disease i had
Just had a flashback of you announcing "your nipples aren't that big for the size of your boobs, I've seen them"
All she said to me last night is that when her eyes roll back, to release my choke hold.
If you spent as much time trying to get laid as you do masturbating you would surpass all of us.
Dude, you chugged an entire bottle of tomato sauce and got us free drinks for the night. No way was I gonna stop you.
Where are you? I hear fireworks and you've gone missing. I'm sure that is not coincidence.
He goes "sorry was at the gym. Some of us workout " and I wanted to text him back and go "well some of us do occasional drugs so we don't have to"
A guy wearing a shirt that says "eat shit and die motherfucker" just held open a door for me. He's got manners.
I feel like an elephant shit on me and left me to be miserable
Sarah is throwing up still and I'm eating salad with my fingers
I'm armed with nothing but $4 lip gloss gum and my phone. Ready to take on the fucking world.
Like I said, all hypothetical...unless, of course, you'd be into that. My heart may skip a beat.
Dude I had my dad cock block me once
Randomize
