That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
The sex was so good, I called my ex during the 2nd time just so he could hear. Is that mean?
i think she is mad at you for trying to take a shit in the back seat of her car
obviously you don't know the college version of myself. if there's something i'm ALWAYS willing to put up for it's alcohol.
Found myself carrying 2 bottles of .89 euro wine about half a mile to where im staying. and someone stopped me and spoke to english. apparently, i reek of drunk american.
I stole an ensure out of their fridge and started chugging it. That was when Maria made me leave.
No idea how he made them, but vodka water balloons were a horrible idea.
Responsible roommate: 1. Someone who takes a huge shit at work so as not to clog the toilet at home.
Today is all about not throwing up, where the fuck are my keys and does anyone know what happened to that guy in the panda suit my roommate had sex with last night.
ON A SIMILAR NOTE MY DICK SIZE PSYCHIC SKILLS ARE SO GOOD
I have bruises from doing the splits on the poles, if that doesn't scream bourbon street regret then I don't know what does
Aaaand the winner of the worst decision of Sunday night goes to me as I pull up to his house in my lingerie.
Omg this place. I'm at a neighborhood party. My mom has kissed two other moms. Where am I
So who has the penis shaped party tray? You or your mom?
How are they?
Amazing! These new boobs are going to break blouse buttons and wedding vows!
Randomize
