Dear yesterdays makeup, Thank you for always being there when I stay up late binge drinking on weeknights and am running late to work Friday morning. You're the best.
no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
the pizza man had no reaction when jackie and me opened the door naked, i guess he's used to that shit
we got blazed and looked up peoples criminal records
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
he came on my stomach and it was 1000 degrees in his car. i smelled awesome.
I was more traumatized by the table collapsing while i was going down on you.
I'm pretty sure they changed the plants at the grocery store because of us
I just commented on the education level of his penis.
eating jello out of the cup. with my face. while on the toilet. i am at my lowest.
I was wearing my get used bookstore shirt when we fucked. Ironic yet appropriate.
No piss test, hell yeah
FALSE ALARM. PISS TEST. I NEED YOUR PISS.
EW HE LOOKS LIKE SOMEONE'S DAD
i feel like doing his laundry was not included in the job description when we became fuck buddies.
Fucked a DJ on a jetski today... I love florriidaaa!
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