If he doesn't notice me by the next party, i'm just gonna go up to him and pll his pants down and blow him.
Sounds like a plan.
we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
Found a cheerleading trophy in my shower this morning. Explain.
If we could never, ever tell mike i pissed in his closet, that would be really really great
I had a great penis washing session in the sink before I left. Washed off all the bar and green beer
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
You are not about to raise that baby deer, you can BARELY raise yourself... Return it to it's mom now.
i love that feeling when you wake up and have no idea how you got back to your dorm or why you have mac and cheese on your cheeks and eyelashes in your mouth
I have Denny's hours of operations written on the palm of my hand....not in my writing, in a girls writing, is that as good as or equal to a cell number?
Well sort of got busted by a cop while having sex outside, so your call
I'm going to write a new song and call it "Did I wax my vagina for this?" remind me to never go across the country for a penis ever again.
So apparently my mom hired someone who goes by "DJ Dog Dick" for the family christmas party?
I'm so sad at the lack of dick in my life I am going to get sauced and make rice krispy treats
I'm SO high. And there is so much pudding in this car
Randomize