We're hooking up, I have a toothbrush at her place, and yet on leaving her apartment a minute ago we said goodbye with a hi five. WTF?
You're upset about this?
I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
quit re-tweeting John McCain's tweets
the 3rd commandment: and god said, if you buy a handle.. you must finish it.
I need Christmas break to be over. I'm tired of fucking my old High School girlfriends
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
He's a good guy, we stopped by his old church.
And you didn't burst into flames?
at the last minute we also decided to throw an egg in the beer bong. and he drank it, shell and all.
My fridge broke, and apparently the back is missing. The repair guy just fixed it with a pizza box. I didn't ask where the box came from, but it wasn't mine. Reason #20 why rent is cheap.
Smoked Hookah in the playhouse last night. Childhood was so fun.
Nothing is worse than post drunken playoff baseball loss sex
stop sending me battleship coordinates and get back here so i can suck your dick
I put xanax in the cake batter
Did you really? It all makes sense now.
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
He literally just patted me on the vagina and said goodnight to it.
Randomize
