Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
trying to fathom saturday night and the fact that Rainn Wilson now hates me. my brain hurts.
Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
They should make Glad Forceflex condoms.
Just witnessed a fat girl fall off the treadmill, pop a medicine ball, and drink coke out of a water bottle all in one workout.
Just saw a girl trying to crack an egg with her butt cheeks. I think I know what we're doing thursday night.
She threw up in my garbage can last night and walked home with it this morning so she could clean it out...
She is dropping it off on the way to the bar at 7.
He showed up 3 hours late wearing roller skates and acted like nothing was wrong with that.
Oh god I may vomit into the teacup of debauchery.
The smell came through my closed door. His farts are made of rendered tires, and apparently, ghosts.
I just stole some rubbers from the girl I stayed with last night so I can use them on a different girl today..
Is this a drinking picnic?
Is there another kind?
A relationship is waiting for him to fall asleep so you can cum (finally!) while watching porn
Write this down so you can tell me in the morning. "That bartender needs to be in my mouth."
Randomize
