our school mascot just walked into class and threw condoms everywhere. welcome to college
after taking her first shot and having her first random hook up she finally feels like she is ready for college
she has no idea
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
There was an Altoids can full of urine in the bathroom. I do not want to know what was going on in there.
Is it bad if one of my goals right now is to snort blow through a licorice?
Don't answer that. It is bad.
I just had nipple jewelry returned to me in the law library.
LET US USE OUR GENITALS TO CELEBRATE THIS VICTORY
I just had a great idea for an etsy shop. Sell all the shit bitches leave from one nighters
I was orgasming and dying of laughter at the same time. I think I've found the One.
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
Are you awake? I feel like I need to confess my sins to someone not on this side of the country.
It's official. Post baseball sex is better than post hockey sex. I hope the Blue Jays win the world series.
You just had sex during the movie Radio. This is an all time low
I knew how high you were when you put a french fry in your mouth and said 'fuck, this tastes like meat but feels blue.'
So, I woke up under a table with an alarm clock on my face, my hair in a bag of popcorn, and my phone charger wrapped around me.. what happened?
Randomize
