So he flipped me over and suddenly went limp then told me he was thinking about his ex.
so you punched his junk, right?
a kid in a transformers shirt tried to pick me up last night at work. he also rolled up on a bicycle, the kind with pedals. do i look that easy?
They should make a Rosetta Stone that allows men to understand what the fuck women are actually trying to say.
Do you know how hard it is to conceal the fact that you puked all over the bed that someone is sleeping in?
underwater hpnotiq shots? sure why not.
1 be hot 2 flirt with everyone 3 use hotness to make people do things for you. It's a simple model.
By the end of the night I was using him as a leg rest and he was handing me pizza rolls when I wiggled my hand. It's a proven method.
Just thought i'd let you guys know that my dad was roofied at a lesbian bar last night...
Well it's been 24 hours and I still feel like a mammoth sat on my balls
How do I discreetly dispose of sex toy packaging that is recyclable? What to do...what to do?
He's such a champ. He puked on purpose just so he'd be coherent enough to roll this blunt
My body is like , remember when you wouldn't let me puke last night? Good luck at work fucker.
Im gonna get home and destroy this bag of chicken nuggets with my soul.
woke up and somehow me leather belt got torn in half. either we partied with the hulk or some chick just could not wait to see my dick. probably the former tho
I woke up in a limo in long Island, Ny this morning. Talk about a black out
I need dick so bad, I’m dressing sexy for the school pick up line and sports practices to entice a few of the DILFs
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