i am positive it's ok to drink. it's just pieces of the plastic knife i forgot was in the blender.
Just had a dream about an abnormally large bottle of tequila. No more depressed drinking for me.
Come find me please? Im in a ditch.
That doesn't help me much...
I'm right under the moon!
Her parents walked in on us. So for my birthday they bought me a blow-up doll with their daughters face on it. I don't know what to think right now.
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
Crashed the mayor's bday party, no list for some reason. Wore suits. Ludacris was there.
i want to have awesome sex and feel fuzzy.
Just blowing bubbles with my nipple rings in my shower.
You always make things weird.
there's a drunk hobo under the bridge wearing a jester hat and screaming at women
Hurry up I'm getting mooned by a hobo
Take the weirdness of Japan and add the insanity of Florida and that's Jimmy
Funny you say that, I just sold my stripper pole to my mom tonight...
They were so sore! Either I have bed bugs or you were biting my nipples last night and don't lie to me.
i have pictures frm only 4 hours ago that will fucking ruin you so i suggest yuo come get me.
Where are you?
dunno. ask mike. bring pain killers. and underwear. and my dignity.
I don't think you understand I turned down McDonalds for you.
Randomize
