No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
i'm at a party where swedish girls are dumping laundry detergent on each other because it glows in blacklight. this is awesome
do you know anything about the $5 bill with my name stapled to it in my purse??
you would think someone who fights for his country could fight to last longer than 2 minutes
you woke up and yelled "the tv is moving" and fell on the floor and passed back out
I didnt realize my nipple ring fell out until he coughed it up.
You paid the taxi driver with a comb last night.
He just got home drunk. He ate 5 snack cakes, said Little Debbie's his bitch, went upstairs and fell asleep.
hey dude, just got with the girl in H4. so mark H off the apartment list
haha we are half through our lease and already checked off 17 letters
They ran out of toilet paper, so I had a girl rip down the streamers so I could wipe.
HOW MANY BOYS NOT ONLY APPROVE OF YOUR PLAN TO BECOME POCAHONTAS, BUT WANT TO MAKE SURE YOU DO IT RIGHT? One, the answer is one, and he is the best and if anyone ever tries to steal him I can assure you they will never be heard from again
May he have a McRib induced stroke and lose the feeling in his tastebuds.
Not even a manhunt keeps my brother and his friends from the bars
try to milk me bitch
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