Is there a "Plan B" app for my iphone?
Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
then you put baby powder on the bottom of your feet and walked to your room so "ladies would follow the footprints"
When it gets to the point that I'm more comfortable being naked at his house than my own, it's time to readdress the fuckbuddyship.
before we even ate breakfast we'd found an eighth of weed in some old purse she never uses. it was gone by lunch
My liver is begging me not to go, but sadly enough for him my feet and hands control me getting there.
This is a great bar, except you can't even randomly burst into song without them assuming you're drunk and cutting you off.
I asked him why he was eating an entire can of refried beans, the only answer I got was "revenge"
I need drugs. Hard drugs. Today. Not tomorrow. Today. Something relaxing.
Remember when you walked in on me sleeping INSIDE a pillowcase?
If you shit your pants and not say anything about it right before we have sex one more time I'm dumping you.
I love you man I just want to hold you and fuck you until you only know my name
I don't know who you are but HOW THE FUCK DID YOU GET MY NUMBER
no real plans this weekend. trying to derail the alcohol induced fucking hell train I've been riding for the past three weeks.
Dude just saw some some guy puke out of a car window on the highway going to school.
My body isnt used to all this fresh air, sun and booze....ok well maybe just the fresh air and sun...its used to the booze.
Randomize
