I would like to feed your fingertips to the wolverines.
Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
Trust me, I wear more condoms than socks. I wouldn't risk infecting my cock. It's my livelyhood.
no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
it went kinda like vodka, childhood memories, screaming/cursing, fist fight, tears, broken shit, passing out. in that order. tis the season.
Either way I should probably pregame on the plane
Also, turning on the light this morning was a 3 step process. Way too hungover.
He was having an allergic reaction to that new brand of vodka Eric brought, so he just started chasing with benadryl.. Talk about commitment.
i don't think they understood the house was collapsing. they kept dancing and jumping and asking for more cups.
I'm really hoping to find some quality strange ass tonight while at my court appearance.
She asked me to go inside, make myself a drink and slip into something a little more naked.
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
If my plane goes down do me a favor. Break into my house and get the batman costume and swing out of my bedroom.
uh...sober saturday NEVER has a good ring to it.
I don't know who's idea it was to get wine for a frat party but my poor pitiful hung over self really fucking hates them.
Randomize
