her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
The one night I bring a girl home you leave the footloose soundtrack playing.
Note: fake nails and fingering anus.... Not a good idea
It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
He insisted he brought his alarm clock everywhere, and then the girl screamed "fuck French people!"
So neither of us had a dollar bill and we couldnt find a straw so we spent all nite doing coke through penne pasta
I'm just gonna stay I'm bed where it is warm and cozy and nobody knows me as the girl that puked on a stripper
At this point, if I'm not getting fucked by a man in ONLY cowboy boots, it's not worth it.
Just had a VERY VIVID visualization of wrapping a pizza around my cock and fucking its brains out. Soooooo less weed more dates?
You could be a whistle.. And just ask bitches if they want to blow you all night
Let's celebrate that I used a condom
Well, I told him that it's not all about him. Then I gave him the best blow-job in the history of blow-jobs.
That was a beautiful concert to sleep through ...
I know - Don't let me take drugs from strangers anymore
(440): please tell me you didn't have sex in my dress.. IT'S A VIRGIN DRESS.
Randomize
