she had a pic of herself in a bikini as the wallpaper on her iPhone... I'm sensing a Tyra banks kinda girl. shit.
she just asked me to help her create a twitter page for edward cullen's hair.... seriously.
Just snuck alcohol into the hospital for my mom.
we fucked while he was on the clock. He didnt even take off his bullet proof vest. Dont tell me thats not bad ass.
Last night you were talking while puking saying, "ahh the shoes and the purse, I'm gonna have to wash those"
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
You do resemble something that has been used as a chew toy.
I vaguely remember having a 'grass is greener' conversation about our nipples. Dream or beautiful reality?
Beautiful, beautiful reality
Although I'm glad you didn't let my climb in the sink, I really wish you would have let me pretend to be a duck in the shower for a little longer
I wore a shirt that says "more tequila" to my bday party last year and that's why I want to be my own friend
There's always a silver lining when massive voluptuous tits are involved
My fucking earlobe is bruised what the hell
I miss my innocence.
I miss being able to say, "I've never done this before."
So he called his lawyer from the bar to confirm the cost of hitting the douchebag before flooring him. I respect his planning skills.
one of my students asked me today if i was having a baby. fuckin 4 year olds and their lack of filter. time to get back to the gym i guess
Randomize
