How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
Dude, I'm in her bathroom and there's crab shampoo... is it worth the risk?
You're missing what this discovery implies... she's got a fucking bush.
I wish there were wingman of the year awards.
you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
I swear every time I make the effort to make my hair look nice, someone jizzes in it.
now I know why they wanted me to come. apparently gay guys are stripper magnets
The guys had to come into the bar bathroom and pep talk us all off the floor
this is you don't wonder off at 3 am with no pants on. Just stay there and pray to god you don't get arrested for being on school property.
Just put an ad on Craigslist for a fake groom... I'm sure only non creepy sane people will respond to it
Florida has a way of just fucking with a person's soul and jizzing all over their hopes and dreams. Like existential bukkake.
He told me my outfit made me look like a twelve year old then proceeded with "but you don't look like a whore"
We had sex on the beach. I was completely naked except for my sneakers. That's when you know
Whiskey and tits go great with anything. Especially fire.
It's really hard to masturbate now that I live with girls who actually function before 11 am.
Guy running next to me at the gym is judging me. I think he can smell the whiskey leaking out of my pores.
It was terrible. I am sore from head to toe, neither of us got off, and we were at it for an hour and a half, I faked having a heart episode so we could stop. It worked.
Randomize