I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
That's it, I refuse to live in a world where sparkly vampires beat Batman at anything.
Sometimes I worry for your future but then I remember how big your boobs are.
I was just referred to as 'the margarita slut' by an 11 year old.
She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
I feel like i got beat with a pillowcase full of tequila shots.
i know this sounds kinda weird but his cock smelled like fabric softener. it was so refreshing.
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
Just thought you should know that your brother tried to febreeze his floors with cooking spray last night.
in a thick russian accent she said "im not so good with english, much better with dick"
the only good thing about going home with him was that he was prettier than me.
Dude I woke up and he was pissing in the corner on his clothes... I called his name an he replied " I got this" and continued.
Ok thats great. so just to recap: you fucked a billionare in his penthouse last night, and I had a glass of wine on the toilet.
Considering all of my stomach contents ended up in my center console, I'm a bit peckish.
Uber southern baptist grandma and uber flaming cousin just got into an argument about whether jesus is OK with gay marriage. Aren't these things only supposed to happen at Thanksgiving?
Randomize
