This kristen chick is fuckin nuts. She's pyscho. She's a trainwreck. She carries baggage. She's... Perfect.
awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
My mouth tastes like defeat. Did he at least have money?
He sent me a pic of his Junk. He said it was a Brett Farve valentine.
i swear, as soon as they invent a cure for herpes, he's mine.
The cab driver is now flexing at a red light...
I found him on the floor in the kitchen eating cheese and tomato. I mean a block of cheese and whole tomatoes, he was alternating. Thats why your cheese has teeth marks.
Apparently at 2 AM I decided to let the world know about my newfound love for elephants
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
Please put me on a plane and hypontize me into forgetting the little bit of last night that I do remember.
It's pretty telling that my resolutions all involve who I will sleep with in 2014.
It's important to play to your strengths.
he had DANDRUFF in his PUBES. 0/10 would not blow again.
I knew how high you were when you put a french fry in your mouth and said 'fuck, this tastes like meat but feels blue.'
As of right now, my vibrator and a bag of snickers share the same drawer
Everyone got an underage but her
How'd she get out of it?!
She hid in the FUCKING DRYER
Randomize
