took shots out of a medicine cup. i can get used to college.
it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
hey I'm just gonna fall asleep in the bathroom at the library call me when you're done with class
so we started it doggy style, but since we were really drunk kinda fell to the side and turned into a 'lazy dog'... my new favorite position btw
he tried to make a toast, but hit the moving ceiling fan with his beer instead
i robbed the continental breakfast last night
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
Just puked off the 5th floor onto a car windshield. This is my life and I'm proud of it.
I'm spending tomorrow with her. What should my ridiculous personal goal be? I've already got a blowjob while eating a cupcake
Stripper just cleaned my glasses with her nipple...
I have accepted that I am a sexual predator. What I can't accept is the lack of sexual men for me to seduce in this town.
I do NOT want my proposal story to start "...he was peeing on me and then..."
I just masterbated to the home shopping channel...what have I become...
I peed in front of kids, unfortunately
I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.
Randomize
