tell her no need for introductions. and that you've read about her on the back of toilet doors.
Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
I don't know where I am but there are firefighters
Judging by the grocery store, everyone stocked up on frozen pizza and beer for the blizzard. If our generation ever faces doomsday, we'll go out smiling.
I guess on the plus side everyone really, really enjoyed my nipple clamps
This guy just showed us his webbed feet to prove that his son was actually his son
For the love of God you used a 40 foot extension cord to bungee jump out the off the 2 nd floor
Do you relize what downtown will be like this week? Like open season. But instead of deer its hot baseball players from all over the country that we'll never have to see again. I swear the college world series is a gift from god.
I know I'm not the first to fuck in a park but i deserve props for doing it at 3pm. On a sunny day might I add.
I'm sorry you were dumb enough to get played by a male cheerleader
I FEEL LIKE I CAN TAKE DOWN A FULLY GROWN MOUNTAIN LION WITH ONLY A POINTY STICK OH MY GOD
The bad news is I fucked my exes girlfriend. The good news is I100% understand why he left me
You should never be more than a quarter of a mile from a working toilet
Preach!
Burnt food and a broken vibrator. Disappointment after disappointment. Is April a man?
The people at Perkins seem so judgemental. Big deal if i'm handcuffed to stripper in a star-n-stripes bikini. We still gotta eat.
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