The pink midgets playing hockey is the EXACT reason cold meds and alcohol do not mix. Period.
I'm going to get drunk on champagne by myself.
Oh no wait my cat's here. Thank god for a second there I sounded really sad.
did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
you were so drunk you slurred your pauses
I wonder if they've ever made a porno about the song "she'll be comin' round the mountain when she comes"
Showering in the handicapped shower. Im THAT hungover.
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
Im drinking in homer but I guess Egan got arrestest on an "assault by water ballon" charge but tom actually threw the water balloon in question at the bartender.
You give an incredible blow job. I wanted to make sure you know it was appreciated
i tried giving myself a bikini wax.1. i hate you 2. i think i'm dying
I blew past the Governor's motorcade going twice the speed limit and DIDN'T get a ticket. God wants me to get laid.
he's annoying when i'm sober but vaguely hot when i'm drunk so yes i do have a preference and it goes by the name of vodka
Dude, Kevin called the cops on the cops.
i woke up with a shamrock tattoo on my wrist and a fat bruise on my hipbone. please tell me its not real.
But I think I successfully seduced her with my alias.
Randomize
