member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
i've been thru my totinos phase. then after reading the ingredients and nutritional info i almost puked in my mouth. its like having the bastard child of pizza hut and mcdonalds invade your kitchen and start stabbing your digestive system.
don't blame me for your drunken lack of judgement
big words... still drunk. dont care. your fault.
Its 11am, im in the city in a pocahontas outfit, lost a heel and found a gold rolex in my lingerie.
I was blowing him while he was singing Happy Birthday to his girlfriend on the phone. I win.
U thinks that's bad? He told me that he had to envision high school wrestling in order to bust a nut with some girl
Well its all fun and games until you get naked with your ex in the shower. that's NOT flirting
The shrooms have turned on carrie. Change of plans. We're getting stoned and finding bacon.
Besides, I'm booked tomorrow. I'm planning on drinking heavily and crying in the bath.
Sorry I trained your dog in Spanish last night. At least he listens to someone now.
I need to stop waking up with no pants on.
what happened this time
I dont know everyone was gone and there was a bird in the room
His 89 y/o father walked in on us. Judging by the gasp/moan, I don't think the 1920s prepared him to see another dude inside his son.
You don't understand. This boy has the Mona Lisa of cocks.
I woke up thinking it was Friday. I was disappointed (to say the least). I am pretty sure I have gained the quarantine fifteen (but I won’t know until I try to put something other than elastic-waisted shorts on). And I am probably going to need dentures because I am grinding my teeth so much. But hey--this is temporary, right?
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