wow, i just saw a girl period all over the floor. get my shoes
I was worried if he didn't show me his penis, he would kill himself
I'm blazed at jack in the box and my order number is 420. I wish everything in the world made this much sense.
Just got a script for 120 vicodin with 6 refills. I feel like michael jackson.
I could make treat bags
Just drive me around campus, I will be able to smell their innocence.
Hooking up with him would mean my type has officially become... drug dealer.
I need to find a more grown up way of dealin with a hangover at the office than pringles and mountain dew at 8:30 am...
Ive only seen a dude masterbate on a train twice, once on the Jtrain and once on the Ftrain... trust me you never wanna see where the subway turns around.
Please stop letting me make out with hot lesbians.
Definitely not. I may be your best friend, but first and foremost I am a guy. Please continue.
Seriously, webMD this shit for me, I cant move and I dont wanna die until I have something worth fighting over in my will
Was it you who made out with a toothless guy last night?
I just fell down my stairs, guess that's how my sunday is gonna go
Hell no. Last time I used a Slip N Slide I ended up with bruised ribs, a broken fence and the hatred of a half naked girl with a sprained wrist.
there must be tiny pirates in the freezer stealing our rum.
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
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