just next time i won't let coke make me think I'm superman and drink a shit ton.
Do you think when graham bell invented the phone he ever thought that people would be using them to facebook on the shitter?
Puked in a cab. Passed out on my floor an my mom put a blanket over me. Home by 1045. I won shitshow trophy last night.
Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage?
we went to the store to buy cookie dough and conditionally went straight towards the booze
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
I'm doing laundry in pjs and heels, home alone with my margarita bucket.
He just said "fuck you" to the bowl he's eating things out of
Hahaha wear something that says i'm here to party but wont go farther then a handjob.
It's a goat... but where the fuck did it come from?
Between my sister puke and rallying at the bar and my brother sending a drunk passed out naked pic in which his dick was exposed, I don't know which sibling to be more proud of this weekend.
you got to sleep with him and don't even remember it? that's like sleeping through an entire vacation
Easy. Go to walmart, buy a bag of charcoal. everyone gets a present and it's cheap.
The thing about pooping in the woods during hunting season is you never know if someone's watching you.
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
Randomize
