so remember that time i slept over and came home in the morning to realize i left my vibrator next to the faucet for parents and brothers to see? this is worse
I had a bacon mcgriddle for the first time today. It was like eating a baby angel.
you dont have to exercise, you threw up last night!
She had to put it in. I told her I was too drunk and didnt trust myself to not put it in her ass.
oh don't forget that when we go furniture shopping we have to find a matching bong so put more money in the furniture fund
EMERGENCY: IS A KAREOKE RICKROLL ACCEPTABLE IN THE YEAR 2011?
when you tell me you got me a birthday present, I have to assume it will show up in a drug test.
Just been one of those weeks where alcohol out weighs friendship
Also, I threw up on the playground again. I've honestly had more fun there this past summer than I did in my entire childhood.
if the future wants me to fuck him, then i guss i have to
The chick got into the cab with us and said we have 3 chances to guess what she just stuck up her ass. Hello to you to!
Have you ever just woke up in the morning and felt pregnant
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
What are best friends for?
Picking your clothes up from a one night stand you had nearly 2 months ago
Verdict: uncircumcised.
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