You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
I'm not saying he has herpes, I'm just saying he slept with my friend that has herpes.
just bought 2000 rhinestones and a heart shaped stencil at Micheals...I think the cashier knows i'm Vajazzling
No I am not eating basil off your cock
I will accept it in the form of tooth necklace but if you have better ideas I am open to suggestions.
I found a blow up pig at an adult store. He will have to fuck that on video if he wants anal. Also, I bought a pair of clear high heels. Tell your brother I love him.
You made out with him a lot. Almost as much as you told everyone Paul was the zamboni guy.
Remember that time we turned a can of Axe body spray into a flame thrower?
Be quiet or buzz aldrin will come beat you up with science
So you thought it was a good idea to make plans for the same time same place with the guy you were sort of dating AND his best friend you slept with?
I just had the polyamorous Canadian hockey player do the splits while naked in a handstand at my apartment just now. And yes, I know it’s 1:30am on a Thursday.
The dentist walked in on me trying to bottle some laughing gas to take home with me. That high.
Boys winking, cowboys tipping their hats, old people looking disappointed.... ah, I had forgotten the unholy powers of exposed cleavage!
You are my hero.
I'm sitting here drinking whisky and listening to The Wiggles, I don't need a social life
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
Randomize
