You ever start fucking a girl and realize she kinda looks like your mom?
Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
Just used the D.E.N.N.I.S system successfully.
get home. someone threw up in the fishtank last night.
i dunno what you eat but your cum is all over my underwear and it smells like pretzels
Biggest lesson I have learned in college: Drink if you are happy. Drink more if you aren't.
Just got to school and somone already mentioned the amount of cereal im carrying.
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
Please come and rip my uterus out before it does it itself
It was everywhere. My dick was a sprinkler of lost future children.
Maybe he injected his testicle?
Man, you got so high you own goaled yourself in FIFA then got up celebrating.
Just walked past the field playing Jesus music with a fanny pack full of condoms and beer. Happy Sunday.
No. I don't like you. I like your penis. Chin up. At least I like part of you.
He took off all my clothes, fingered me, than said "would you be more comfortable if I was naked too?"
Randomize
