Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
I fucking love fucking science majors-- she told me that she wanted to know if her gag reflex got better or worse with alcohol, and that her initial evidence had been inconclusive. So, next few weeks, yeah, gettin blown periodically. All I have to do is keep a log.
my new ipod has external speakers and a video camera...all i can think about is how much more convenient it would be for me to make a pretty decent sex tape
Just wana tell you im wearing assless jorts tonight. Ive been waiting my whole life for this.
They had half off shots during the fourth quarter. I was powerless.
Grandma just handed out bail money... it's officially christmas
She offered to massage my back by hitting it with a sparkly purple double dildo... Bi chicks can get creepy
theres a wall by my room thats like, a prime fucking wall. before i move out SOMEBODY is gonna fuck me on that wall, goddamnit.
I honestly wish you had parked the car in the terminal garage and fucked me in the backseat but I guess I should be more forward
lets just say that i have already today: gotten drunk, got in a fight, got stranded an hour away from home, found a ride, sobered up, and slept. woken back up, and here i am. its been a long day. Day drinking is bad for friendships.
Just did an upsidedown spineboard shot. Gotta love lifeguard parties.
Never admit to being cold at those things. That is how you end up waking up the next morning naked under animal pelts... or so I have heard.
I woke up to him crying and pouring pixy stix in my mouth saying they would bring me back to life.
hey sorry i didnt call i just got out of jail, so you still dtf ?
Like bruh, I’m a free range girlfriend
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