Memory from last night that just came back: me forcibly jacking him off while he yelled I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
Best friends brother. Beat that.
i prefer some hard alcohol, but wine makes me feel less of a progressive alcoholic
We sat on the porch laughing about hilarious the sunrise was. And that we can do drugs again in the morning, thank god
Yeah? Well I'm currently predrinking downstairs in my room by myself. Absolut and water with a hint of mint because I'm using the glass I keep my toothbrush in. Fuck, you bitches better get off work soon.
You're in a tuxedo, you can pee wherever you want.
drunk freshman in the bathroom puking keeps saying "i'm a peasant" over and over
Not saying puking on the side of a cab was how I imagined freshman year of med school but...
As you passed out you started to cry and say "Mufasa" over and over again making everyone else cry.
Well I'm in a stranger's bed.
Gotta leave to watch the Lions
I'm on the Coaster ride of shame, currently sitting across two nice old ladies smelling like condoms.
I AM A SEXUAL NIGHTMARE
Her tits are so fantastic they gave him a panic attack.
Randomize
