Oh, don't even get me started. Harry Potter is so pure. Twilight is just teenage girl porn.
Way too hungover to be taking this many family pictures
How many ice cream sandwiches is an acceptable meal replacement?
2.5
Howd you meet this guy?
I found him next to my pants on sunday morn.
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
Its like a zucchini between his legs. An orgasmic zucchini.
hung over. covered in somebodies makeup. and ready to drink.
I woke up next to him fully clothed but my thong was around his neck. Polling to decide if we had sex or not starts now.
I must have some kind of deep rooted instinct that tells me when a boys virginity needs to be taken.
My 19 year old brother just hooked up with his 45 year old cougar kindergarten teacher. These sorts of situations make me realize why the sorority girls call him Wondercock
Next time I feel awkward in a situation I'm going to just yell "free bird!!!!" Like some redneck at lynyrd skynyrd show
Gary just stuck his dick in his Guinness. I can't even make this up
It true. It written in the Bible.
Yes I remember that, right next to the passage where jesus said unto his disciples, pop molly, fuck bitches amen
Never underestimate the power of titties
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