Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
i spent 15 mins trying to take money out of ATM with my drivers license saying, "what the fuckkkk" everytime it didnt work
Dude, this place has 10% alcohol beer on tap. It's like God's semen.
he said i was chugging vodka in the parking lot, gave my # to a married man, started a food fight, and passed out at the bar. how could he NOT consider that a good first date???
I just found out why they dont make table-dance tables out of glass.
i guess i called my mom last night. she wasnt nearly as impressed with what we did in the bathroom as i was
whenever music plays i find myself always doing kegels to the beat. its like the new foot-tapping
I am thinkingif I am doing snow Angels in your living room, I probably had too much to drink
and he's drinking a bud lime in his profile pic meaning i can out drink him, meaning i would clearly be the alpha in our relationship
So somebody asked her is she's okay.She turned around,started running and screamed "Ballet is running through my veins" before doing a small pirouette.It's amazing how she managed not to fall.
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
So on a scale of 1 to Friendship-Over, how mad would you be if a rando I brought home sharted on the shag carpet in the living room?
When you're trying to sneak from the bathroom to your room with dildo, but it glows in the dark and suddenly your entire life is illuminated in the shape of dick
We watched Purple Rain and then proceeded to have sex while listening to the album. If that's not exactly how Prince would want people to honor him, I don't know what is
just had sex in a stairwell with six feet five inches worth of drama
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