glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
The girl sitting next to me in class is writing her to-do list under the title 11/31.
The worst part is I think my tongue cut his penis and now he wont talk to me.
she said she was gay. i said prove it. she said "ok i wont fuck you"
So I realized I'm not completely sober when the automatic toilet flushed and I screamed
we cut her off and put her in bed but by the time we got back to the drinks she was already there shirtless. she's the topless tequila ninja
We got to the party at eleven, and the host was already in the hospital from being stabbed. And she brought the stabber home with us when we left.
No exaggeration. At the gas station she handed me the mop from over the counter and told me that's my last drink of the night
When we were done making out, some guy ran into the room yelling, "I'll save you Brandon! I'll save you!"
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
I mean like, my liver will beg my brain for mercy. Brainll be like I'm Greg Jennings. Liverll be like I'm Darren Sharper. Brainll be like hold my diiiiick.
maybe facebook could make a notification like "someone tagged a photo of that guy you used to bang and still think is really hot with his shirt off"
Well, I told him that it's not all about him. Then I gave him the best blow-job in the history of blow-jobs.
For a second I thought he was going to give me an intervention
You can't give interventions in a bar!
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