talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
Tell mom and/or dad that I am going to be home late. I am really blazed. Don't tell them that part, though.
A moment of silence for all our pussy whips bro's who had to endure the NEW MOON premier!
Fact: my bamboo plant has grown 2 & 1/2 inches since I started watering it with bong water
I just sang country roads at the top of my lungs with my cab driver. Tonight was a success.
You raged at the rock climbing place for not selling beer and then just said "fuck it" and pulled out a flask.
Fuck. I have to get my shit together by lunch. Mission impossible.
It was easier that asking where the vagina platter is.
Spotify knows me way to well. You mention swinger club and guess what it shuffles to? Danger Zone by Kenny Loggins
You were drunkenly dancing with a statue you affectionately referred to as "The Captain." I wasn't going to deny your happiness.
I cannot handle Xanax... I just turned my computer on and I googled how to work YouTube
They both showed up at the same time... to surprise me. One had flowers and the other had chocolates. Needless to say, I will be at the bar all weekend long trying to figure out how this happens.
Sorry i ignored you for so long. I think my vibrator is broken.
The car smells like weed is an understatement.
The air taste purple.
Randomize
