A good Q tip ear swabbing is better than bad sex.
How many times can you lose to your mom in beer pong before you can no longer show your face around campus?
I'm already at the bar. It's 2 PM. Help
the trick is not to think about where her tounge has been.
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
There was a stripper pole on the party bus. Was being past tense because some fat chick somehow tore it from the ceiling while grinding
I know. I need to get a vagina tranquilizer.
Don't you realize there's more to life than sex and pizza rolls?
I think I'm the only sober person in the whole bar. If you count drinking less than 10 tequilas sober.
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
Well the good news is ill probably have my new boobs by the time he sees me naked
all night she kept rolling over and mumbling something about wanting an extendable retractable urethra.
Do you remember when you first moved into my parents house with me and we came home to find that my dad bolted the headboard to the wall
This is why I only drink in places with a C or D health rating
Is it sacrilegious to take tequila shots on Saint Patrick's day?
Randomize
