I thought she had blonde hair
No, Gonorrhea actually
There's just this way he looks at me that makes me want to suck his soul out through his dick.
I never thought I'd hear the words "aww you pulled out" and "you're so sweet" in the same sentence.
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
Ive given up on my natural charms. Im trying different accents till some girl wants to hook up with me.
We met on a dual walk of shame. It has to be love, we can't let that go to waste. I want to tell our children that story.
at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
Well it went from being a hug to a straight out tackle through the back door.
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
My liver hurts and I just woke up from my first sleep in two days
Sounds like the perfect vacation
It is very possible that having sex with you just now just got me into Yale
Had a dream I went to Disney to visit you and then I got really drunk and puked all over these little kids in line
Going on a first date tonight...pros: my boobs look amazing. Cons: my abortion isn't until next week.
Is it unhealthy for me to do shots of pinnacle by myself in my apartment right now? Asking for a friend
I got dominos and had to stop whilst eating and take a moment of silence for how good it was
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