he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
Ketchup is God's man juice
You wanted to speak to the manager of mcdonalds as to why a "bag of cheeseburgers" isn't a menu option.
Also, at 1:30 I emailed myself saying, "are you there Margaret? It's me, god"
It's kind of hard to say bye to you when you fall asleep on the bar..
I just threw up blood. Also i just remembered i got hit in the face with a 2 by 4.
I tackled a mailbox like a linebacker. He almost broke his hip and his friend lit a bottle rocket off inside of the car. Yes it was a successful night.
Yours weakened by children. Mine weakened by a forearm sized cock for 8 years.
He brought a TOOTHBRUSH and TOOTHPASTE with us on our date..... I want to go home and forget I ever decided to be nice and go on this date in the first place...... A TOOTHBRUSH!?!?!
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
it's ok my mom asked me why i had a guys shirt on and also why there was chocolate all over my bra
No more house parties. We're almost fucking 30 years old and I slept until 6 pm.
Should I be concerned that the new guy I'm seeing just referred to my stealing a sailboat in college while drunk as "wholesome"?
I had a glass of wine for breakfast. It's gonna be a rough week.
I should be in a better mood, I just went home and had a quickie on my lunch break.
I had a sandwich.
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