Me too!
When god put her together, he was drunk & feeling creative... a vagina here, sexually ambiguous breasts there, and a pair of shoulders that would make a linebacker jealous
she must of just birthed a child cause her labia touched the floor
we went to the store to buy cookie dough and conditionally went straight towards the booze
super high. so of course there was a shoot out at the bank. there are 20 cop cars no lie. if i make it out of this i will never smoke again
I locked the porch door but I left a spare key on top of the keg on the side of the house
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
I don't think casual Fridays means I can go to work with dried cum in my hair...
Let's play, "guess how long my Neighbours have been watching me dance naked".
This day sucks. I just wanna play ostrich and bury my head in your boobs.
He always finds the good stuff. He's like a truffle pig for bud.
Come to my pity party. It's being hosted in my basement. The theme is ambiguously sexual cuddling and wine.
I came back from England with a face tattoo and the only thing anyone can talk about is my beard.
I love you.
Bad choice
The progression was banging a stripper banging an unemployed stripper banging a sexual entrepreneur quarantining with benefits totally fucking whipped. Get it right dude
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