oh well we may not be friends on facebook but at least i got laid
HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
We agreed on being friends w/ benefits. Lets see if that really happens.
Ok, so that was not supposed to go to u, my bad. I feel horrible.
I just realized i came back home with my lei that one night. How do i forget my bra but remember my lei?
There's two girls at the bar sniffing each others boobs.
i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form
I just kept screaming "I'm fucking a preacher's son!" Also, this water tastes like weed.
Oh we were great hosts that night. We made sure to leave all the beds open by passing out on the bathroom floors instead.
I made out with a guy because he ate a grape lollipop and he tasted delicious... not my proudest moment.
Just spent 10 minutes washing away my own puke. This gas station lady loves me.
So I definitely tried to pay a cab with baseball tickets last night
So last night was the first of "I got cut off before I walked in the bar".
I love how my parents bring water bottles filled with vodka on family trips
I just found a contact in my phone named "Nick from The Party". Who's nick?
It was just another case of she fell in love I fell asleep.
Randomize
