He looked me in the chest and said "I think I was visited by the titty fairy last night"
this is two weekends in a row I've been the pantsless girl at the party. I love my social life.
Remind them to make the "above the influence" commercial about us fallin off a ferris wheel
Just met someone from Jersey. No fist pumps or jagerbombs. Kind of disappointed...
First night in the new apartment. There are 12 people here i don't know, Tequila, and a crying girl locked in our bathroom. I think the apartment christening is complete.
We're friends with people in his circle of friends so we're half way in. It's like I've already given him a hand job.
I have acquired 14 pictures of hard dicks tonight... I was on a mission. Don't even pretend you aren't proud.
rolling absolute tits, turn on the red lights for when i get home.
Don't feel sorry for me. I'm getting Red Lobster and sex tonight. Nothing can bring me too far down.
Milk that cash cow for all the shots she's worth
I don't know why I do this to myself his dick is a constant source of disappointment.
Something must have happened, they started yelling truffle butter and you said we needed to leave NOW
he bought me ice cream then took me home and fucked the shit outta me. you can't write this kinda romance.
Just letting you know that I just spent 11 dollars on a car wash... Because you had sex in my car.
Where are all your bongs? Your Dad wants to make sure they're put away before his family gets here.
Umm....in my room, on my closet, under the bed and behind my laptop.
Randomize
