the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
So basically our separate showers turned into one shower, to save water, which turned into a bath, which turned into sex on the bed, which turned into drinking beer in the bed, and thats what the stain is from... bud light. sorry.
i was playing the convince him im sober game through texting. i spelled most of the words right. i hope.
yeah, we figured out that passing a joint between cars was a pretty bad idea
She's cheated on every boyfriend she's ever had with the same guy. She's like a slutty yo-yo.
I think my whole family judged my ability to change under a blanket.
In a moving vehicle and other people in the car
Woke up next to a tiki torch spooning a plastic flamingo on a welcome mat i've never seen before with a "happy valentines day" balloon tied to my wrist, oh yeah and "i am a cougar" is written on my chest in sharpee and all the kitchen furniture is upside down...
Hes pre-made beer lollipops so he "can suck before the sex" QUOTE!
If it's up to me, I'll already have my pants on and walking out before he gets soft afterward.
He's writing a strongly worded email to Trojan right now
I TOLD YOU THE BARESKIN CONDOMS WEREN'T AS RELIABLE.
MY WHOLE FAMLY IS TALKING ABOUT MY BUTT
WAIT I'M COMING I WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT TOO
For future reference, don't put tape on your nipples. Ouch.
Must be why he thought choking was foreplay. Like WTF? No.
He asked if I could not say his name during sex cause he liked the girl in the apartment above me.
100000% expect a picture of my ass in them
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