PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
i had the deer in headlights look when she walked in and i was digging in her hamper
He is like the real live version of the state fair..
His roomates just started party boying me. He stood there with the look of horror on his face.
She's doing shots in her underwear, a fur hat and mittens. I'm never coming home.
The night started going downhill when I set my foot on fire.
He returned my car yesterday. Found a duffel bag with beef jerky, condoms, and a handgun this morning. Slightly concerned
You're on Grindr at the STD clinic. I love you.
AND I JUST GOT FUCKING DAUGHTER ZONED. NO. I'M DONE. I HATE BOYS. ASEXUALITY HERE I COME.
Professor just informed us that she can't come to class today because her daughter broke her glasses and she can not see where she is going. Am I still drunk from this weekend?
I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
I joined the mile high club last night. I ran a mile while high on coke. It was glorious
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.
I have a hickey in my new work ID photo.....
I walked in describing her boobs thinking I was talking to you only to hear dad say 'I remember when your moms were like that'. ALWAYS tell me when they get home early. Always
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