The cop didn't care that I was peeing on the wall of my dorm building... All he said was, "come on, it's 9am."
Take one last look at my face, because I'm drinking it off tonight.
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
Thanks for talking me down from peeing on his window last night.
I am now curious as to how you would have aimed.
Let me begin my 3 part apology by saying that you are a wonderful human being...
he was alternating between taking bites of butter and bagel. he said it was easier than finding a knife
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
I'm sexting at the thanksgiving dinner table...this is a new holiday tradition.
someone to text and fuck? since when does that constitute a relationship?
since 2006
So half of us were already throwing up outside when the Ukrainians ask us if we're ready to start partying yet. I love this country.
Come to the roof. We are drinking breakfast.
Just finished off half a bottle of vodka. Can't take in anymore liquids so I ate 3 spoonfuls of your powdered gatorade to fight off the hangover. Wish me luck and check me for a pulse when you get in!
All I know, is I had green sex and beer and got driven home. That's it.
I don't know, we got really drunk and I slapped her with an ear of corn.
Opening my shipments of mascara and nipple pasties this morning like a boss bitch
Randomize
