But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
It's sad how good I am at giving people diseases
If Jimminey Cricket were here with me he would be so disappointed.
then the nurse gave me a bag with my personal belongings: phone, wallet. jacket, keys and a BTB burrito
dude, never let a drunk girl playbite your dick. the doctor came in laughed and left.
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
Shitshow foam night was such a success
He stumbled into my room, flopped on my bed, shoes on my pillow and asked me for a juice box. Then fell asleep with the juice box on his forehead.
Obviously he considers you not fucking him as fucking up. Thus making him fuck up. Based on this I believe he should be disqualified from the race to your vagina.
Ugh a 13 year old just asked me why people drink, I had to explain it without making it sound good. I need a drink.
I had sex with him and I blame the Doritos
I was asked last night if Magnum makes a XXL..... I don't think I've ever broken this many condoms in my life
Please come to class. I miss you and I have a horse mask
if wiping your ass w an envelope isnt the definition of hitting "financial rock bottom " then nothing is!
Where is the baby squirrel I found last night?! I've looked all morning I can't find Morris anywhere did someone take him?? ðŸ˜ðŸ˜
Honey, I kept trying to tell you it was just a pine cone.
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